Friday, April 15, 2011

All the positive thinking in the world can't make me forget that today is the day I should have been bringing my newborn home from the hospital and preparing for a naming at shul tomorrow morning.  I am trying so, so hard to focus on the positive, but I just can't get the sad out of my head.  It is like a dark cloud that I just can't push away no matter how hard I try.  It seems that no amount of sunlight can make the dark clouds go away permanently.

Will the weather in my brain never return to summer on a regular basis?

2 comments:

  1. on anniversary days like this one it is not really the time to focus on the positive as much as it is the time to grieve. the day before you try to focus on the positive. the day after you try to focus on the positive. the day of you cry.

    it is a dark cloud. don't focus on pushing them away permanently. do work on catching as much sunlight as you can. sunny with clouds is not a bad place to be.

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  2. Thank you. Sometimes I feel like those are the days I need to work hardest to push the clouds away, but maybe you are right, maybe on those days I should let myself mourn and cry and focus on getting through the easier days first.

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